Say No to Inequality #Inequality #BAD2014

Today is Blog Action Day which brings together bloggers from different countries to blog about one important global topic. And this year’s topic is : INEQUALITY.

Where is it okay for inequality to exist?

I say, Nowhere!  Man or Woman? Nowhere!

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I’m a feminist. But there are times when you wanna scream and say, YES, I am a girl and that I’m proud of it.

Right from the very moment you were conceived and declared a girl while still in your mom’s womb, your parents have had a trauma. Then followed the arguments and tears on whether to abort you. (Oh you think, I’m from Ancient period?? Open your eyes and see.) You were lucky enough to be born and your life has never let you forget that.

From sacrificing your favourite toys and chocolates for your brother, to being molested dirty-touched by your favorite uncle, your life has just begun. (Oh, don’t give me that surprised look!!).

You are now eight and is suddenly not allowed to ride your bicycle in skirts or frocks. While you are still confused on what had happened, you had reached the so-called puberty. Your parents are even more worried now and your night-outs have practically come to an end. You thought you don’t give a damn and have gotten busy scoring grades, joining a job and being an earning lady. You are now enjoying your “independent” life and then realize that your workplace is also crowded with chauvinists and bigots.

But now, the time has come for you to be “settled”!! Settled?? What does that mean- oh yeah, marriage! You must now be getting married to a nice guy (aren’t good marriages equally good for everybody?) You go teary-eyed when your Dad says, “She is the apple of my eye, from now on her happiness is in your hands. Take care of her”. (At the back of your head it rings, “Does he really believe that the parents of sons have some special rights and parents of a daughter can only ‘beg’ for her happiness”. How else can this dramatic situation be justified.

From “adjusting” yourself to the “new” family (Wait…did the family make any adjustments to accommodate you??) and getting a “new” name (The so-called adding your husband’s surname to yours), you have started giving up on who you were. I don’t honestly  want to brood over the “MIL” issues also. While you call your in-laws as Mom and Dad, what does your hubby do? Call them as Aunty and Uncle!! Am I wrong? Correct me if I am.

Now, it’s been a year after your wedding and you are constantly been asked about your “inability” to conceive a child. (Shocked??? It’s been ONE YEAR, in other words, TWELVE MONTHS, and you are still not having a baby!!! So, it definitely is ‘cos of YOUR not his medical issues).

Fine. So, you are a strong, modern Indian Woman. And you reside in a country where she had been worshiped (once upon a time!). But now, beware when you take a step forward, you might be brutally gang-raped, ‘cos here’s a country who says rapes take place because of a woman’s clothes and her behavior. It’s been two years since the brutal gang rape and death of a woman on a Delhi bus. What has changed??? N.O.T.H.I.N.G.Sarahs-Blog

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I’m a feminist. But, I’m a woman who effectively juggles a work life, her social life, her home, family life and traditions and festivities. I’m strong, worldly-wise, opinionated, independent, economically self-sufficient and probably always being judged (just like you).

But, I’m Me – who enjoys my individuality!!!

I know, that Men has issues too. Who is stopping you? Raise your voice. After all, we are discussing inequality here. It is 2014, for god’s sake! Isn’t it high time we stay united and thrive for a change? To hold hands and say, we need both men and women for a balanced society? Let’s create awareness.

Today is Day6 of the Write Tribe’s 7 Days To Rediscovering Your Blogging Groove. And we are asking a Question.

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Extracted from my article on Woman’s Day.

Comments

  1. Great post ! very passionate and thought provoking, enjoyed reading this …

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  2. ellytreehugger AKA elly stornebrink says:

    I can feel your passion in this piece Shalini: well written and you make a lot of really good points – for example, that women were worshipped at one time in India. Hmmm, what happened to change that? And I had thought there were changes since that brutal gang rape on the Delhi bus; it was sickening to read about that…we are all connected and I grieve for women everywhere as I am one too. And by the way, I would like us to call ourselves ‘women’ not ‘girls’ as I think this is more empowering: we want to be seen as women, not girls! 😉 ❤

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  3. I can feel your anger Shalini – very eloquently written. From a woman’s perspective, you know we truly do wield a lot of power. When we are young we try to wield that power directly but as one gets older, we learn to wield that power quietly and subtly. But never feel we don’t have the power.

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  4. What matters is one’s individuality, Shalini. Perception of society hell bent on exploitation is a human tragedy, Brilliant post. I support the cause of feminism and yeah, I am a communist for a better & equal society:)

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  5. I really liked the tone and POV of this piece, Shalini! Such a feisty voice and so thought provoking, bringing up important issues about gender equality. You go, Girl! With more women raising their voices like this, we will make progress towards equality.

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  6. So glad that you wrote these…I don’t understand why people feel ashamed of calling themselves feminists..As if it is a bad word and a bad thing to speak about women’s issues…Thanks you for writing these,,..and good you added the note about men too…I added one in my post too or I get posts saying ‘Men don’t crib and so women should apparently shut up!’ aarghhh!!

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  7. Shalini, good that you have used this post to bring up so many issues when it comes to gender inequality in India. I used to think of myself as a feminist until I realized that having any such label actually inhibits my understanding of any issue concerning women in a more holistic manner. So now I would rather be a better individual first than anything else, and try to see things in as detailed manner as I can and understand the various complexities behind all such outer phenomena. Because only then I can contribute in my own way to the struggle for anything meaningful. If I continue to generalize I just add to the problem and not really do anything substantive. That’s why I am always hesitant to write about such topics these days, though once upon a time I wrote long essays on many issues concerning women in India.

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  8. Very valid questions and concerns, Shalini. Most of the men and women think along these lines, that itself is a major step towards equality. We might not achieve it today or tomorrow just like that. Raising our voice, we are one step towards the destination. And some of the concerns you raised here like changes after marriage and the judgements later on, in order to change that both men and women have to work together very hard because its deep rooted within our minds. Well written, Shalini!

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  9. You are a feminist. The definition of feminism according to the Merriam-Webster dictionary is, “the belief that men and women should have equal rights and opportunities.” Feminism is a belief in basic human rights. I am a stay-at-home wife and mother, and I am a feminist.

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